So, here’s the short of it: tickets to All the Great Books (abridged) are collecting dust, and no one who’s seen our production can understand why. This show is of the same quality, caliber, humor and performance as our (abridged) productions of Shakespeare, America and Bible. Same cast & crew. Same venue. Same time of year. Same overwhelming responses from audience members… at least the ones who have seen it.

True, there are other productions that opened in January, but none of them are comparable to what we’re doing. It’s not like there are 16 hard hitting comedies playing in local theaters.

True, we’re also opening another show in January, This is How it Goes, which also deserves attention.

But, since this show has been so dependable, from a business standpoint, Jobsite depended on Books to do what all the other (abridged) shows have done for us: to financially support a bulk of our season. Books sells out, it advertises This is How it Goes, it sells our subscriptions, it exposes new and old people to Jobsite, it brings in the budget for the Mamet’s and Churchill’s and Gobioff & Paonessa’s – shows that need that budget. Sure, all our shows do that, but to a much lesser degree than an (abridged) show ever can.

My point is, this isn’t just another pitch to get you to come out to a Jobsite show. Well, it is, but it’s a pitch for help to get people to a show that’s really critical to Jobsite. This is something that has historically proven solid for us, and we quite judiciously banked on it, and people are suddenly not showing up for what is dollar for dollar probably one of the best and most entertaining ticket deals in the Bay.

People who have seen it are vocal. For example: see here, and here and here.

Please, if you have a minute, either e-mail or blog about the show to your Tampa peeps. My contacts/lj lurkers either don’t live in Tampa any more, or they do live here but are already hard-selling the show.

If you want, feel free to link back to this post. Or copy and paste it. It’s free copy. Take it. Spread it like herpes at Gasparilla. Whatever floats. Just please help get the word out.

Hey, look at that. I just got apathy whiplash – that moment when you’re at work and you spontaneously don’t give a fuck about anything you’re doing there.

So, it’s been awhile since I posted a crapload of links.

Buy your tickets now!

It really is as great as everyone says it is. We sold out opening weekend for a reason. Do yourself a favor and get your tickets now while you still have a say on what night you can get a ticket. Or don’t take my word for it: check out the bazillion comments and reviews on the Pillowman Media page.

Turning Japanese
Y’know, for a culture with a reputation for being the biggest workaholics of the world, these people sure have a lot of frickin’ free time. Watch them apply their ninja tactics to descending a flight of stairs (among other things) and holding a pen.

Film
I must see this.

For all y’all independent artistic industry peeps out there – especially the Jobsite kids – you have to see how Terry Gilliam is raising money for his next film. This is great.

Media Tech
Since iTunes (one of my all-time favorite software apps) released 7.x, it’s been both very impressive and a major pain in my machine’s ass. It only agrees with my iPod about 10% of the time, and it’s a fucking memory pig, randomly jumping from 40Mb to 150Mb, not including the 3 startup side programs that are set to remain active from the moment you boot.

So, some indy’s got a program coming out called Songbird. It’s in dev-mode (pre-alpha?) but you can download it anyway, and it’s made me very curious. Despite that its logo is a fat farting bird, it’s got some groovy functionality that’s worth checking out. At the very least, check out this features video and this one too. And since it’s Firefox based, there will be extensions (like an iPod sync.) Someone want to give it a shot?

The Miscellaneous
Highly entertaining – the concert rider for Iggy Pop and the Stooges.

A great remedy for telemarketers.

A very cool little web toy that enables you to compare what you’re buying online to a relative visual reference. Even if you don’t use it, worth playing with it for a minute.

Sure, you were born in the year of the yak, but what other useless minutia don’t you know about the day you were born?

Dig the groovy illusion: Maggie Thatcher’s a cow no matter how you look at her. MAGIC!

Go ahead. Watch it. I dare ya.
Talk about creepy. Imagine, it’s 11:30 at night, all the lights are off, except for the warm fuzzy glow from the television – a nice quiet episode of Dr. Who. And then you see THIS!

Here’s a little supplemental from the next night’s CBS news to explain a little more of what that is.

Getcher rock on.


Hey, look at the douchebag!
Ever wonder how much respect a TV reporter has for the entire nation during a storm?

Politics
45 percent of those polled blame the Bush administration “either a ‘great deal’ or a ‘moderate amount,’ for the 9/11 attacks." Blame. I recommend you stock up on your popcorn now for the midterm elections.

This has to be the best practical joke ever. Evidently George Bush has to meet with President Nazarbayev of Kazakhstan to diplomatically smooth some wrinkles caused by a movie featuring Ali G creator/performer Sacha Baron Cohen. Apparently, the problem is the US has decided to not censor Baron Cohen’s movie based on his Kazakh-based character, Borat, and the Kazakhs are afraid that Borat will MAKE THE ENTIRE COUNTRY LOOK BAD. Back when Kazakhstan threatened to sue Cohen, “Borat” responded on a video saying, “I'd like to state I have no connection with Mr. Cohen and fully support my Government's decision to sue this Jew.” This is awesome. Bush has to have diplomatically talk about shit with people that are more fickle and mentally repressed than he is.

Cool Art Stuff
This is actually a cool effort. Someone used the Half-Life 2 video game engine to create a virtual tour of Frank Lloyd Wright's "Falling Water" structure.


Dig the groovy sculpture that you can’t see in Tampa because the art museum, or what’s left of it, sucks and never shows cool stuff like this.

HTS
Yes, you too now interact with your own high-tech duckpond simulator. Swear to God.

And finally…
Behold – Pjotro!

So I missed last week's post, and this week's is a bit late, so here's a bunch of stuff that's been collecting in my bookmarks folder - but there's some tasty stuff here, I promise.

Fun with Pictures
We'll start easy. I don't know why I find this so enjoyable, but SomethingAwful went old school. Their Photoshop geeks took a random boring picture and just played around with it, putting the people in it in different situations. Why am I explaining this? Just check it out. It's fun.

In the News
Men's Health magazine has done some research (no, I don’t know how) that has determined that the angriest city in the country is Orlando. St. Pete’s #2. Miami only made a whopping #7. And Jacksonville is #9. If you connect the dots, then apparently Tampa is the nexus of hatred. Did I mention that the study was national and not just of Florida?

A federal appeals court ruled that if a motorist is carrying large sums of money, it is automatically subject to confiscation. No shit. Apparently having more than a certain (unspecified) amount of money on you is evidence enough that you are guilty of… carrying a lot of money?! That’s a federal offense. Home of the free.

"… that lie we have been told, the separation of church and state, people have internalized, thinking that they needed to avoid politics and that is so wrong because God is the one who chooses our rulers." – Katherine Harris. Those goddamn, evil, baby-killing Founding Fathers fucking lied to us!

Surprisingly, the lovely Katherine Harris and her Orlando Fly-In Rally – whatever that is – were sold out, not just by one invited special guest, but by all of them. Nine invited bigwigs, and about 40 other supporters were all simultaneously having car problems and washing their hair during the event. “They confirmed that they would be here,” Harris said. “I don’t know what the problem is.” Um, maybe the fact that you’re a pariah to the entire Republican party? Or maybe it’s that you’re a psychopathic, Machiavellian, step on your grandma’s jugular in your 4-inch stilettos to rig an election cunt? Just spitballing. Maybe both?

And finally in politics, Make Cupcakes Not War.

Tickled
For reasons that people with an age range +/- 3 years of mine will appreciate, Choose Your Own Adventure.

Best Fiction of the Month
You’ll never watch Star Trek the same again. Read this. Here’s a little sample: “One minute they're sitting around the campfire singing and BOOM there's a giant version of Commander Riker trying to smother them all with his stadium-sized scrotum. I made sure to fake a door lockout too, so they were trapped in there for hours looking at Riker's taint and trying to breathe around his ball bag.”

Video, video, video
Man have I got videos. First – okay, I know this is old, but I hadn’t seen it in awhile. And there’s nothing that funny about the video itself, but you have to watch the whole thing and listen to it in slow motion. No, I don’t know why I think it’s so funny. But I do. Fuck off.

One of the best independent animations EVER: Bring Me the Head of Charlie Brown.

The Office (ala David Brent) is back. Honestly, I haven’t had a chance to watch the whole thing, but it’s an organizational video for Microsoft, and from what I’ve seen, it’s brilliant. The first video is 20 minutes, and the second is like 17 minutes. Great stuff.

The Next Show
Get your tix now. This is a one-time performance you won't want to miss. Also, I've resized this banner, so it's a little more aestetically/bandwidth friendly for everyone's blog. Check out our banners here!

Not a whole helluva lot of tasty stuff found this week. I even waited a day to see if anything cool came up. Maybe people are starting to worry about fillin' up the tubes. Anyway, here they be:

GET THE WORD OUT AND BUY FREAKIN' TICKETS!
We sold 96% of our opening weekend. They're probably the cheapest ticket in town. It's mindlessly fun. But our sales for this weekend our hurting, and something just tells me that we're going to turn people away final weekend, which really sucks when no one shows up this weekend. Please come or if you're not in town, spread the word to those who are. We need the help, and those who go will be glad they do. And if you haven't at least seen the commercial for it - WATCH IT.

Vote!
Best of the Bay voting ends tomorrow. Go vote for your favorite theater company now. More specifically, vote Jobsite. Seriously, it's easy. You do have to fill out like 17 votes to be eligible, but it's a lot easier than it sounds.

Politics
The Republicans "seem to be anxious to tie [the recent London Bomb plot] to al Qaeda.... If that's true, how come we got seven times as many troops in Iraq as in Afghanistan? Why have we imperiled President [Hamid] Karzai's rule and allowed the Taliban to come back into the southern part of Afghanistan? Why was Iraq deemed to be seven times more important than finding the al Qaeda leaders for the last five years?" - Bill Clinton in a tasty little interview.

Make a little contest with yourself: see how far you can get through this article before you punch or curse something. President George Derrrr Bush is apparently frustrated by the lack of Iraqi support for Americans in Iraq. He can't wrap his massive intellect around the fact that "Iraqis had not come to appreciate the sacrifices the United States had made in Iraq, and was puzzled as to how a recent anti-American rally in support of Hezbollah in Baghdad could draw such a large crowd." So... notice that he's totally content and apparently doesn't give a shit about the majority of people in his own country who don't support Derrrr. (FYI - it's a NYTimes article, so it may fall under a login-umbrella any second. Get it while the gettin's good.)

Dead?
I know it's old news by now, but it deserves to be linked. Bruno Kirby croaked Monday. I just about croaked when I head about it on NPR yesterday morning, and the NPR announcer person said Kirby was known for City Slickers 1 and 2 and When Sally Met Harry. Yes, she said "When Sally Met Harry". And she's a female. What the fuck. Why does no one remember him for playing the limo driver in Spinal Tap?

Art/Media
Here's your time killer. The National Portrait Gallery has a tres cool website displaying portrait covers for Time magazine for the last 75 years. Not only are the covers cool, but the site design rawks.

Here’s something interesting. My weekly list of links, while albeit longer than usual, is filled with cool, artistic, or groovy stuff, and not a whole helluva lot of politics. That’s a nice change. Well, it’s a whole buncha links, so I’ll get to it:

Mmmm. Original works. Sketch Comedy. Jobsite. Opening weekend.


Shopping
I’m not really sure why I like to own and display weird crap in my house that fucks with people, but it’s the only reason I want something from here.

Blog o’ the Week
Kathleen Reardon wrote a spot-on blog nailing the Bush Admin’s diplomacy and negotiation style (and lack thereof). It’s a quick read and highly recommended.

Cool Web Stuff
Ever want to know what that song is on the radio? Well, you certainly can’t depend on the DJ anymore, because there isn’t one. However, you can go here.

Rather simple, and nearly pointless, but a cool concept and a nice 3-minute timekiller.

Word on the Street
“Thirty-six percent of respondents overall said it is ‘very likely’ or ‘somewhat likely’ that federal officials either participated in the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon or took no action to stop them ‘because they wanted the United States to go to war in the Middle East.’”

Groovy Art
I can’t say anything but “cool” for this site. Check out the Bazantar.

A part of me really wants to understand how this works. But a bigger part of me just wants to look at the pretty colors. Scroll down to see the video.

Well… the artists makes really cool stuff. Out of paper. And I’m not talking origami either. Click the A4 Papercut link to start.

Drroooool
I want this. And I don’t even know what I’d use it for. Probably porn. You can probably skip the first minute of the girl who looks a lot like my first grade teacher.

Video Coolness
This is the second funniest thing I’ve seen all month. The first is Jason Evans throwing a baby at a camera, but that video is still in production. So, until then, you must watch Darth Vader Being a Smartass. And no, there's no reason the video why it's flagged as inappropriate. You could show it to a 3-year-old.

And if you’re pants are still tight and wet from that Star Wars goodness, check out the Omen-quality eerieness that was with the very first preview for Star Wars. Tres chic nostalgia goodness.

Here's your week on the interweb:

Politics
I’m still working on a nickname: Train-Wreck. Queen Hubris. The Dragon Lady. There are so many. For right now, I’ll continue calling her the Bush/Cheney 2000 FL Campaign Manager & Twunt In Charge of Florida’s 2000 Elections.

Anyway, Katherine Harris’ campaign is going so swell that the Washington Post felt the urge to remind people that three months ago the Florida Republican Party told Harris they wouldn’t support her US Senate race because she wouldn’t win. In a statement yesterday, Harris called the letter "old news" and said that party chairman, Carole Jean Jordan, had never expressed concerns about her campaign. In her own statement yesterday, Jordan said, "Uh, read the letter you dense twunt. We said you were fucked, and you still are."

In the same article, apparently there’s some hub-bub about MA Gov. Mitt Romney (R) referring to the Big Dig as a “tar baby”. A Romney spokesman told the news agency that the governor was "unaware that some people find the term objectionable and he's sorry if anyone's offended." He will now use the more politically correct “Porch Monkey”.

Back to Harris: the Republican-leaning Tampa Tribune scooped the Times (aw snap!) this morning. Harris concealed a grand jury subpoena from top campaign advisers hired to help her deflect negative publicity. "Finding out about the subpoena caused me to wonder about what was going on and what else I didn't know" said Glenn Hodas, Harris' third and most recent campaign manager. The article does emphasize that the subpoena doesn't mean she's actually potentially guilty for breaking any law. Just that she's lying so much to her own staff, that they're jumping faster than the Titanic. For those keeping score, she's currently working on chief-of-staff number five.

Big Scoop. The Pentagon lied to the 9/11 commission. “Maj. Gen. Larry Arnold and Col. Alan Scott told the commission that NORAD had begun tracking United 93 at 9:16 a.m., but the commission determined that the airliner was not hijacked until 12 minutes later. The military was not aware of the flight until after it had crashed in Pennsylvania.” I guess the panel “debated referring the matter to the Justice Department for criminal investigation“ but opted to pass a note to the inspectors general of the Transportation and Defense depts. Better idea: let’s conduct the next investigation of Maj. Gen. Arnold and Col. Scott at GITMO.

Hollywood
I don’t get. I just don’t get the fucking obsession. People so engrossed over a fucking baby, that they’ll flock to stare at a wax dummy of it. It's a stranger's baby! I hope the next picture someone takes of it is while the kid's being cornholed by Michael Jackson.

Poor Mel. Seriously. I feel bad for the guy. Okay, that said, this is still funny.

And in Mel’s defense, the Daily Show slapped the media’s manipulative methods (my alliteration, thank you) of covering irrelevant shit like Mel Gibson’s recent DUI.

In case you didn’t know
All your snakes are belong to us. Motherfucker.

And of course, the most important link in the world:

Get all your bloggin' goodness here.

Knowing that I'm somewhat responsible for this video just makes me all fuzzy with a disturbed kind of joy.

Hey kids. You may have noticed I fell off planet LiveJournal (among other planetary bodies) about a month and a half ago. At this point, you may have a few personal questions, so instead of a proper journal, I’m just going to field what I imagine your questions may be.

( The detailed answers )

The short answer:

Since I like to claim that one of the reasons I have a livejournal is to keep people not in my frequent and immediate circle abreast of what I’m up to, and since I’m drinking coffee at midnight, I suppose I should do one of these little updates.

…

…

(Sorry, I was thinking of breasts.)

Oh yeah, so the latest. Um, the latest is nothing. And everything. I’ll preface this now by saying that if it’s not included in this update (e.g. love life, my New Year’s resolution to learn voodoo, etc.) it doesn’t exist, hence no update on that subject.

Currently, I’m simultaneously rehearsing ( for this )

( for this )

and ( for this )

That’s the gist of it. I show up, someone tells me which script I’m performing that day, I pretend to know what I’m doing, I go home, and I wonder where my day went.

Also, I’ve been periodically bouncing Kitefliers stuff back and forth with trufflesfl, and I’ve been bouncing a new creative project back and forth with some other kids. The latter is so conceptual and new, that’s it’s too new to even bring up.

That’s about it. To the outside perspective, it looks like I’ve got nothing but one creative project after another going, which now that I think about it, I suppose I do. I dunno. It’s a forest and the trees sort of thing. It goes back to something Dave Foley said: you go through so much shit in this business that by the time something great happens, it just seems normal and unimpressive.

The good news is that everything is going pretty well. Girl’s Guide was the least of my concerns, because I’m not a third of the show. Ironically, this appears to be the one that’s changing the most. If someone told me this would happen, I would not have recommended it. It’s not usually a good idea on paper to fuck with a sauce that did so well a year ago that we had to add shows. However, we all seem to have a great perspective on this show, and we’re all coming up with ways to make it even better than it was the first time. The trick now is retraining all of the muscle memory for what I used to do. The added benefit is that it feels fresher, cleaner, tighter and more fun to own this newer work than to simply reclaim what we embedded into our heads last January. And for those of you who saw the first Girl’s Guide, you may now have a chance to see a revised, enhanced, and improved version.

One more note on Girl's Guide. For those who don't know, it's also touring to Fort Lauderdale, so I'll be down there for a weekend in April.

In music, I’m still digging Hooverphonic’s Blue Powder Wonder Milk, as well as The Beta Band’s The Three E.P.s, Turin Brakes’ The Optimist LP, and Super Furry Animals’ Rings Around the World (which I’m convinced McCartney does backup for “No Sympathy” and maybe “It’s Not the End of the World” and “Presidential Suite”.) There are other albums in my queue, but those are the ones I keep going back to. Also, just for kicks (and partially because of a conversation I had with broadwater) I just dumped two Hendrix albums and a Steppenwolf greatest hits album into the pc. It shakes shit up and brings me back to some very early roots.

Seen a few movies, too. I think I’ve officially reached the threshold of annoying the hell out of everyone I know with Dodgeball. It was just much better than I thought it would be. Sideways was okay – not worth the hype, but well done. I also had a weird perspective when I watched that movie, so it’s likely better than I think it is.

One last thing while I’m on the film subject. If you’re reading this, you – yes, you – should check out 1 Giant Leap. broadwater and littledorrit recommended this to me awhile ago. I Netflixed it and had it for about two months because I just didn’t want to part with it. I can’t recommend it for one specific reason. I can’t even explain it any better than saying it’s kind of the next logical step from Baraka, but better than that. Among very cool music, it features interviews with groovy people, including Dennis Hopper, Kurt Vonnegut, and Tom Robbins. Like I said, if you’re reading this, I promise you’ll find something redeemable and cool in this movie. Everyone will find something different to like in it, but trust me: rent it. At the very least, it’s a very nice break from anything you’ve been watching lately. Don’t think about it. Just get it.